Happiness

OK, this was a fun day in the sun, the day before December 2008 starts.....!

Blessings for everyone!

Love, C

Discovery, Part 2

The Fort to Sea Trail heads inland, and eventually connects with Fort Clatsop.  The trail tunnels under Highway 101, and along the way there is a marvelous white wooden bridge over a lovely little river.  We saw a squirrel and a herd of elk.  I shot the first photo of the elk, and my adrenaline made me jumpy, but the elk were not in the least skittish.  They stayed in the same general area and were still there when we returned.

Discovery

The day was so mild and warm and even sunny at times, and we decided to follow the part of the 'Fort to Sea Trail' that starts at Sunset Beach. 

 The trailhead directs you to 2 trails.  The first trail goes over a long brown wooden bridge, where you can see the destroyed forest from the BIG STORM of Dec 2-3 2007.  This little trail ends at this beautiful overlook of the Pacific Ocean--(above)

 (continued)

Beyond Rubies

                                          This is IT! 

Our Thanksgiving, 2008 at M and R's wonderful new home.  The little guy doesn't like photos too much lately, but oh well....

M and R worked all day--- they were moving AND cooking the most fabulous gourmet dinner -- Grandpa helped some with entertaining little Dyl., but I do not know how they did it all -- it was a feat!

When I think of their new house and the little family there, I think of a cozy place all glowing gold on the inside.  The colors are so lovely and  the rooms are so well lit, it just sparkles!

Thanks to this 'leap of faith' by M and R, I will be able to go through my ordeals so much better.  I thank everyone who has made this possible, and I also think this is the way it was all meant to be -- no, I BELIEVE this is ALL GOING THE WAY IT IS MEANT TO BE.  

Right now, I am listening to the Teddy Pendergast song "Life Is A Song Worth Singing" -- How about that!

Gotta go,  things to do, etc!!

Love

C.

Great to be Home

M and R and D will be settled very soon in their own little home.  The plan centers around a family dinner at Thanksgiving, when we will all eat together at M&R's house and then say 'Bye,Bye' to the little one.....   This is his Mom's idea, so that the little guy 'gets' that he has a new home.

The sun is bright today, what about that!!  Do you ever remember a more glorious November?

Home, Sweet, Home!!

Onward,

C.

Could Be Worse

Here is some straight information, from me, to those of you who want to know.  Sorry if at some point there is 'Too Much Information'.......

If you want to know, at the beginning, what all of this information will mean, then, it is still the same treatments that I had told you about earlier.  There are no changes.

First Chemotherapy,  Next some type of Surgery, Then, wait and see....

What I found out TODAY:

                                                          

                                                    Biopsy Number One:

The lung Doc was able to cut out a .8 centimeter (less than 1 centimeter) nodule in my right lung, with 'good margins' , and found that the rest of my lung looked healthy. 

 The nodule turned out to be breast cancer, which is, I will tell you, the worst of all the different possiblities there, OK?.... But, as there were no other 'hot spots' in my lungs -- "It Could Have Been Worse"  !!

(Removing this nodule increases the effectiveness of the chemo, which is a systemic treatment)

                                                     Biopsy Number Two:

The breast Doc was able to 'get' 2 likely-looking suspected nodes when she did the 'Sentinel Node Biopsy'... these turned out to be negative for breast cancer..... 

So, I don't know, it does not make sense to me.... maybe the wrong nodes were extracted..?  This is the best possible result with this biopsy, but I don't think the Docs guarantee good results.... "It's Good, so Far" ....

(The reason it doesn't make sense, is that cancer 'colonizes' through the lymph system, usually... although I heard today, that also the blood can spread cancer...  Who knows??? Anyway, how could it be that there is breast cancer found in my right lung, from my left breast without my lymph nodes being positive for cancer, too??)

Other things:

I asked again about the PET scan showing anything in my liver, bones, pelvic region and the new Doc I met today said that she confirmed that there was nothing apparent in all of the soft tissue and bones.  (PET is not good at looking at the heart and the brain.)

The worst thing I have heard so far, was something I was told on October 6th, 2008 and that is that it seems that my actual breast tumor is a rare and quite aggressive type that actually seems to respond well to chemo, but has a reputation for recurrence later.   I have had quite a lot of time to assimilate THAT... "Whatever" !!

I do not know when I will start Chemo, and the lung biopsy was so beyond painful, and I am just getting through with that.... 

I did find out one thing with the surgery, and that is just what my Brother Mark said, that Zophran, an anti nausea drug really does work.  

It is always nice, to have a bit of hope.

I have had a very long day today--

Well, Love and Great Wishes,

C.

Fort Clatsop (reconstruction)

Fort Clatsop, photo taken November 2, 2008, as seen from the trail through the forest....  This is an accurate replica, rebuilt at least 2 times, of where Lewis and Clark spent the winter months of 1805-1806.  

Today, 1:30pm, Canoe Landing, Ft Clatsop Nat Historical Park

This is where the display of the dugout canoes are -- just behind the kids.  This site is down a hill from the Lewis and Clark Fort Reconstruction, and these kids have just been walking through a deep dark forest.... although there are a lot of fallen trees from last year's storm still lying on the ground among the tall firs, hemlocks, cedars, spruces.

Dave has been taking extra sick leave from work every day to 'train me'  and it is really helping.  My orders from my Doc are that I can not drive for 4 weeks from the surgery!  It is also great that taking these wonderful walks every day are good for Dave, too.   We made about 2 m today at a bit faster pace.

Today, we were walking a little further, when this bunch of people appeared.  We decided to turn around, the adults were telling the kids about something, and asking them to be very very quiet.  It might have been that someone knew that this is 'Mama Squirrel's Tree'--- I have some little movies of her munching down pine cones so fast you would not believe it---

Anyway, as we were backtracking, I snapped the group, and believe me, I can not see that little screen on my camera hardly at all...   I really love this photo... think I will figure out a way to send it to Ft Clatsop..... What a JOY to see YOUNG NATURE LOVERS, and the adults who TEACH !

Greetings and Love to Everyone,

C.

Monday, Early Afternoon, At Netul Landing

Along the Lewis and Clark River, a photo of a silly Bodie.  We walked approximately 1 1/2  total, because I was kinda shuffling along -- but every day it gets better...

Airport Dike on November 16

A photo of the Airport Dike 

Sunny Glorious Sunday

Wow!  What a beautiful day... maybe better than a summer day!  Dave and I decided to walk out at the Airport Dike mainly because it was open to the light (the dike is really a road) and there was no one out there.  Bodie was so charged up to run, it would have been pretty maddening to keep him on the leash out at Netul.  Sunny Sundays = more chances of encountering tourists, so it is a good time to go to the special places that it seems only the locals know and use.

My shuffling gait has improved and we estimated we walked about 1 1/2 miles? today....

Does everyone know how to read blogs?

Everytime I enter a 'post' , the newest post is on top, as the most recent.

The scroll allows you to move down through the posts, and when you get to the bottom of the page, you can go to past posts by clicking  on the 'Older Posts'  - or-  you can go to the side where you will see the 'archives'.

There you can click on the month or a specific post title.

I thought that maybe some one reading my blog might be frustrated by this:

That it might seem like I have information that I am not telling.

Maybe that is what I would feel like if I were on the outside, too.

So, I thought I would review this for anyone who might be wondering:

At this time, I have 6 incisions in varying degrees of healing... the new way they do incisions is quite amazing... it is like they super-glue you together again....

I have had a total of 4 surgical biopsies, one of which was considered unsuccessful.

Surgical biopsies give the pathologist the actual tissue samples for the lab.

The Pathologist report is the most reliable, I believe.

It takes many many days for the Pathologist report to be finished.

The Core Biopsy I had Oct 1 = diagnosis of a type of breast cancer

The FNA Biopsy I had Oct 9 = unsuccessful

The Sentinel Node Biopsy I had Nov 11 =  unknown

The Lung Biopsy I had Nov 11 =  unknown

TESTS:  Mammogram, Ultrasound, PET/CT scan, Breast MRI scan, Pulmonary Function Test, Tons of Blood Tests, Tons of Chest Xrays in Hospital, injection of nuclear dye into my areola, and EKG... not in that order...

PROCEDURES:  Installation of a Port to access my veins -- used in the lung biopsy and will be used later in the chemo phase of things.

MY NEXT APPOINTMENT:  About a week from now.  I hope my Doc will tell me the new info along with some treatment options at that time...

SO, do not think I know much..... what I was pretty sure about before turns out to be majorly wrong, so I just wait for the next thing, and in the meantime, I try to go on as best as I can.

Well, take care out there, Love from C.

Yesterday, Saturday

A GLORIOUS GOD-GIVEN SUNNY DAY IN MID NOVEMBER!

Dave is my personal trainer and had me out at the Netul Trail to see how I could do.  I was pretty much shuffling along, and maybe we did about a mile on the level trail.

There was a time when I caught two different breaths into my right lung which hurt ---  a real twangy stretchy pain  --- and after that the lung seemed deeper; that is, I could breathe deeper and longer without hitting a wall of pain.

The best thing I have ever done for myself was to invest in the exercise-walking that we have been doing.  I knew I was only marginally strong enough to withstand surgery of any kind.  I am still only marginally fit, but it's amazing how much the body wants to improve.

Today, Sunday, my goal is to stay on my feet for a great deal of the day.  God has given all of us in the area another sunny glorious day, and what Luck, eh?

Will check in again later today...

Gobs and Bunches of Love to All,

C.

Friday At Home

Today was a lovely day and I am feeling so much better.

Tomorrow, I hope to go out walking.  

There is not much to say about the day I had today, except that it was so relaxing being home.  Rachel made me a lovely healthy lunch with her squash soup and her apple-beet salad.  Thanks so much Rachel!

Today, someone rang our bell and flowers were delivered from Dave and Jackie, Mike's parents.  Thanks very much to you both, Dave and Jackie.

I am up and about.  Ron and Linda visited this evening -- Linda is a real trooper coming all this long way to visit, because she doesn't feel well herself.  Thanks for the really nice gifts, Linda, that was super thoughtful!  Mostly, I hope that you feel reassured that I am OK -- that I can 'take a licking, and still keep ticking!'

It is getting close to 10:30, and my eyelids are feeling heavy.... I should be writing more, but I am so sleepy, I have got to go to bed!

To All --

Love and more Love,

Cynthia

Again, Recuperation

Dave and I got to go home around 11-12... So we are at home now.  Dave has been my private nurse, my love for Dave is so beyond anything I could say in words.  Dave is utterly exhausted, and since we are home, he can start his recuperation.

I am still on pain meds, and let me tell you, there was a LOT of pain.  But, you know, that is the past, and it won't do me any good to rehash the gory details...

Thank you to Mike and Jackie who had lovely flowers placed in my 'recovery room' here at home. Thanks to those who prayed for me.  Thank you to all others.

Please don't fret and worry, it is perfectly OK to go on with your lives!  NO GUILT. OK?

Gotta Go Now and Sleep!

Love to All,

Cynthia

Preparing

Sunday night, have not finished the stuff I wanted to do, but that is typical...!  

Will be 'booked up' probably all of the next week.... so will chat later.

Gotta go finish packing, Love to All.....

C.

Recuperation

Saturday I could remove the outer bandages, I was told, so at about 5:00 AM  this morning that is just what I did.  The bandages are this weird stretchy saran wrap stuff.  They were burning and itching me.  So, at least that annoyance is minimized.

Friday went by in a blur, but M. from OHSU called and gave me some much needed information that is swaying me back in line with the program.  

Thursday I felt pretty low and knocked down by the whole deal.  One of the things that they did when they bandaged me is that they taped up the right side of my neck, which pulled and tipped my head down to the right side.  I could not hold my head upright until today.

Saturday, feeling better, and particularly since Dave has been so incredibly thoughtful and encouraging.  He even got me to take a walk out at the East End Mooring Basin Breakwater where all the sea lions hang out.  Then he drove us out to the beach to watch the late evening sun in the sky -- the sun was only shining on one part of the ocean and the rest of the sky was dark and gray.  It was soooo pretty!

Tomorrow will be busy, have a bunch of things to do, now that I am feeling better again.

Hope everyone is well out there, and especially Linda, how are you doing?

My sister Colette will be stopping by at noon and leaving her keys for her place in Portland.  Three cheers for a wonderful sister!!  Thanks, Thanks, Thanks!!!

We are crossing our fingers that R, M and Dylan will be able to rent their own place soon.... will find out on Monday for sure.  It is a nice house in a nice neighborhood and within walking distance of H's house.

Take good care, everybody.

Love and Heaps of Love,

C.

Halloween Night 2008

Hunter Gatherers of the South Slope

The Day After P.P. Procedure

Much like the weather, we must report on current conditions.

Yesterday, Dave and I drove to OHSU, starting off from the house at 3:44 AM. !! My appointment was for 6:30 AM, and after a few delays, I had my procedure.  I was conscious, but sedated, while 2 Drs and many nurses worked to install a device in my chest that will save my veins.

The surgery took about 2 1/2 hours, then I was able to be released about 45 minutes early from the recovery area.  Dave was of course there for me.  

When I was being wheeled into recovery the nurses said "There's a man in your room!  He's stalking you!"

I said "He's the Best Man!".  (The nurses were really impressed with how wonderful Dave is!)

One of the Docs came to speak with us before we left, and he and Dave started talking about that TV show the Deadliest Catch and lots of other things, it was very fun to hear.

The nurses were exceptional.  The newest nurse trainee was telling us she was born in Astoria, and was related to two very well known Finnish families.  The nurse Jerneen had super hot hands - I told her that she had healing hands.

Colette found us soon after I was released and we had left instructions that we would be in the cafeteria. 

Colette had checked in at the recovery area and they were just trying to get ahold of me because somehow my cross and chain were left behind in the room.  I WAS SO GLAD TO GET THAT BACK!!!

By the time I made it over to the lunch room, I was starting to feel not so great.  The big problem with this situation is the bandages which are making it impossible to straighten out my neck and the soreness on a couple places on my chest.  Sleeping is a problem.

After about 2:30 AM  I was completely awake all night, but dozed a little this morning while sitting up.

I am supposed to leave the bandaids on until Saturday, and I am pretty sure that I will feel much better every day.

OH WELL!

Greetings and Good Wishes to All

Love,

C.

Yah!

Yah!

My Only Sister

My appointment on Monday was at 7:00AM, so my sister Colette let us stay the night at her place in Portland.  Thank you very much, we really appreciated your help, Colette!!

Even in the short time we had in Portland, we did some healthy but adventurous eating -- Sunday night we ate at a Sushi place!  (We still go for the cooked stuff-)  It was really good.  I really loved my East Indian Burrito at lunch on Monday when Dave, Colette and I had lunch together, too.   The prices were low and the food very well made and tasty.

The MRI test I had today made me very glad that I did not have any 'wrong' food the night before... you have to stay very still for a very long time........and yes it is an ordeal.  Glad that it  is over!!

Dave and I got LOST at least 4 times in OHSU.    People there are so nice and helpful, but it is a maze of corridors, sky bridges, elevators and non-corresponding levels between buildings.  We even had trouble finding our car -- because we had trouble getting to the building where the car was parked.

Last Saturday and Sunday, we walked our familiar Netul to Ft Clatsop trail... both times we drove out to the trail in a squally rain storm, but when on the walk the sun came out and it was gorgeous.  Earlier this fall, we saw many grasshoppers and wooly bears of many various colors --most were Orange and Black like OSU !   Lately we see the cutest squirrels -- they munch down on the Douglas Fir cones and chirp insults at Bodie, our dog.  We saw these red mushrooms that literally popped up full grown overnight.  We were debating whether this bird we saw was a heron or a cormorant -- then it stretched out its wings to 'dry?' them, and we found out that had Dave won the argument!  There are a few paired mallard ducks swimming in the river.

On Sunday, I took some photos of the Lewis and Clark River... and on Halloween got some photos of the kids .... I will try to get them up on the blog soon....

It is only 7:00PM, but I am going to go to bed early  so I can get used to getting up super early this week and next.  Will be going in for a procedure this Wednesday at 6:30 AM -- was going to have the rest of the week 'off', but it was my decision to do this procedure earlier to give myself more 'bounce-back' time for next week.

Everyone at OHSU is top notch, in professionalism and in 'bedside' manner.  Thanks!

Love to All,

   C.

PS -- on Sunday, driving out of Astoria, we saw a bit of a rainbow glowing on a big dark cloud --